a fresh desire to work again

It's been such a long time since I've published anything anywhere, I was truly starting to wonder if I would ever write or post again.  The hardest thing, when you've been away so long, is how to start again and for quite some time I've been considering whether I wanted to start at all.  I've agonised over whether or not I should just slope off into a very private non-existence or start again sharing my artistic journey so publicly.

The past several years have been so difficult and, throughout, I pressed on regardless trying to balance the difficulties with creativity until it all just became too much to cope with and I so badly needed to hide away for a while.

The truth is that I was caring for the love of my life, until he passed away less than a year ago.  Just writing this, I am in floods of tears.  He was truly my very best friend, my love, my husband and I am beside myself with grief still.  We went through his cancer diagnosis together hand in hand for four and a half years.  Throughout his treatment, he was so very brave, pragmatic and strong.  He was such an inspiration to me in every aspect of our life and I am so very grateful to have had him in my life for as long as we were together.  We truly loved each other.  I love him with all my heart still and I always will.

We never discussed the inevitable course his illness would take, instead we both slowly adjusted to a different life, a life with many limitations, a day at a time.  Eventually, my own health began to suffer and I was diagnosed with a very strange, rare and serious auto immune illness.  My health never quite recovered and in 2018 I was diagnosed with breast cancer while my husband was in the final stage of his illness.  It was a very tough, emotional time.  I had my surgery, but my radiotherapy had to be delayed as shortly afterwards my darling husband passed away.

I'm doing ok with the breast cancer. I recently had my one year check and so far so good with that side of things.  In January I developed lymphedema, a complication that arose as a result of my surgery and radiotherapy.  I now attend a specialist lymphedema clinic and I'm learning to manage it with special exercises twice daily.  It's a small intrusion into the day and, sadly, a constant reminder of what I've been through, but other than that I'm doing ok with that as well.

I've taken all the time I've needed to get to this stage.   As each week has passed I've felt a little closer to getting back to my art work.  During the past year I've dabbled.  I've been in my studio every day, I've re-arranged my art supplies, I've been collecting sewing patterns, buying fabrics, started dress-making again after 40 years.  I've looked through old sketchbooks, been on a few workshops and been out and about in Cornwall with my camera.  Recently, I had my first holiday away from Cornwall in 9 years.  I went to Norfolk, to Wells-next-the-Sea, as I was very fortunate to get a place on Debbie Lyddon's first ever 2-day studio workshop.  I went with my sister and we had a fantastic time.  It was just what I needed, and getting away helped me gain so much perspective and a fresh desire to work again.

So, I'm starting part time in my studio, working in a small way. It's very important to me that I maintain the peace and balance that I have worked so hard to find, and to build up slowly.  Yesterday, I went in, sat down and photographed the lovely things that had piled up on my desk and then I moved them to one side to begin.

There is so much I want to revisit.  I want to continue on with the Surface Treatment Workshop and the Collage Workshop that I was doing last year.  I have a piece to make for a community project in St. Ives (more on that another time).  I would love to get back to my textiles, stitched and embroidered things, paintings, collages, hand made cards and photography.  So many sketchbooks to share from the workshops I attended (Debbie Lyddon's workshop as well as indigo dyeing, cyanotypes, rust dyeing, natural and botanical dyeing, erosion projects, making paints with earth pigments and experiments with wax, plaster modelling and photography).

I was also very grateful for the invitation to make work for Anne Kelly's book "Textile Folk Art" last year.  I will share more about that in a separate post quite soon.  Also, a fabulous opportunity to be invited by Lynda Monk to make work for Maggie Grey's textile book WOW Book 4 which I think is due out soon, in June.  So that will be a very exciting share too.

I have to rest a lot more now, so two or three days in the studio at the moment is just fine.  I'll see how I go, build up slowly, enjoy the process of creating things I love and offer pieces for sale from time to time.  Many thanks for reading and very best wishes to you all.

happy are those conscious of their spiritual need
~ Matthew 5:3 ~

simple pleasures

today we have a gorgeous day filled with blue sky and the promise of spring

my love and I are heading over to the beach at Long Rock and Marazion

to look for heart shaped pebbles, seaweed and beach string

I hope your day brings you simple pleasures x

stitching a purple sea garden and other dreamy thoughts

1.  the meaning of you  2.  shell  3.  at swim two birds  4.  seated figure  5.  vintage ladies

6.  little riffs  7.  garden in a box  8.  dirt cloud  9.  winter white vintage style felted stocking

 

since I last posted ... it's been a whirl of fun and busy-ness

 

making mosaics and gathering shells for still life

and being inspired by the colours and tones in my collections

 

 

looking closely at shells

and noticing that some of them have their own little sea gardens growing on the outside

 loving purple fossilised seaweed on mussels

 

and being inspired to create my own little purple sea garden on a heart

with a shell found on Mousehole harbour beach

sourcing just the right shade of mauve to use with tones of chocolate and shimmer

I enjoyed creating a new jar scene with this adorable vintage photo
and posed the heart with the little girl who is looking shyly off camera

I wonder how long she was made to stand there and pose ...

the jar photo was meant to be just for a moment in art
but I've kept her in the jar to be enjoyed on my hallway table

I could have sold the purple sea garden heart several times over
and had a lovely commission to make one as similar as possible

but, gladly, and uniquely, they all come out a little differently

 

I called this one ... "believe in dreams"

I adore stitching these one of a kind seaside, ocean and rock pool hearts
I love to source the fabrics and shells that I will use
muse over text and enjoy the quiet time that hand stitching affords

with shop sales and commissions creating the hearts keeps me very busy indeed
 and I think I've made around 20 recently with more commissions still to stitch

and for those who have asked me whether I will be making more textile art beads
the answer is "yes" ... they are in progress but I had to put them to one side
while I got my panel for Festival of Quilts finished

and will share more on that once it's been up to the show
Festival of Quilts, NEC Birmingham 6 - 9 August 2015



for the past couple of months I have been seriously weather watching
and capturing moments of mood and colour on the landscape and seascape
photographing, pushing paint around, paper and fabric collage and stitch
working in my sketchbook towards my show later in the year

something catches my eye every day ...

cloud formations, brewing storms, rain drops on windows, huge waves
mist hanging over the village and rainfall on the far Lizard coastline
the lichen changing colour on the cottage rooftops
the sea changing from silver to deepest aqua, phthalo green and thunderous indigo



there have also been some beautiful sunrises

and early morning pink skies ... serene and calming



it cannot help but inspire ...

I hope this little video works ok ...

it is mesmerising ...

watching the sea sparkles dance

 

of all ... I think silver seas and skies are my favourite

since I last posted work at home is progressing slowly

inside ... a small ensuite shower room is taking shape
with white suite and grey and silver tiles

the living room fireplace has been opened up and a new one created
with a black sea sparkly granite hearth sourced from Carn Brae
housing a gorgeous large windowed wood burning stove

I'm gradually tackling the garden in my spare time
the outside of the house has been painted white and
a new patio has been built to take in the awesome views

my view - vintage style

since I last posted we've enjoyed Cornish time with family and friends down staying
and meals out at The Tolcarne Inn, The Water Mill, The Lifeboat in St. Ives
The Wheel Inn at Tresillian and a night out at Hall For Cornwall

we spent time at Lamorna Cove, Porthcurno, The Minnack Theatre and Sennen
St. Ives (of course ... always my favourite)

Newquay

Pentire Point and Perranporth

we can't wait to return to Pentire Point
to walk this path at a time when the seed heads are at their best

the landscape is already looking autumnal and firing my imagination

which brings me to what's coming next ...

(after completing my current orders this week)
I shall be concentrating on my work for "Seeds and Pods"
for exhibition at Porthmeor Studios in St. Ives
12 - 19 September 2015

my work will include painterly textile wall hangings, framed work
hearts, cottages, totes, cards and supporting sketchbooks

I can't wait to totally indulge in one of my favourite themes
I do hope you can come to the show!

and after that ... autumnal work for The Crow Show
an exhibition of textile art and mixed media with textile artist friend Jo
at St. Ives Arts Club from 31 October - 13 November 2015
(details on the side bar)

I hope you enjoy the photos
and thanks always for reading ♥

days at the seaside

a bit of a seaside post today

sharing some recent photos ...

 

 

in St. Ives with my mum at the end of February

 

quite a warm morning for February

the sun made everything even more beautiful ... if that's possible

the sea was calm and very green, light reflecting off the sand

we watched the seagulls coming in to land

they were quite bothersome that day ... there was much pasty stealing!

I was down in St. Ives again at the beginning of March for St. Ives Textiles

at Porthmeor Studios

 

a view of the island from Porthmeor Studios

 we were given a tour of the fishermen's cellars

at Porthmeor Studios, Back Road West

 

it was a rare opportunity to take lots of photos for St. Ives Textiles

and I will be updating the website very soon

with new work and inspiring photos from the cellars

you can sign up here to receive updates if you are interested ...

 

St. Ives Textiles

 

 

with thanks to Marilyn Weston for arranging the tour

 

it was fascinating to meet one of the last remaining net menders in Cornwall

and learn some of the history of the cellars, still in use

also to see the maritime art installation created by Mark Dion

 

even the walls tell a painterly story or two ...

 

 

vintage art materials in Mark Dion's maritime art installation

 

 the fishermen's cellars ...

 

 

 also at Porthmeor Studios ... admiring the Gyotaku prints

prints made using real fish, squid and squid ink

something I want to have a go at myself!

you can see more fishy prints on the facebook page of Porthmeor Studios here

 

back in Mousehole ...

 

Mousehole harbour

and all last week we had friends staying with us

it was nice to have company on my walks and beachcombing

 

 I took these photos of the "baulks" in Mousehole harbour

during the winter months the baulks are positioned by crane
 to bridge the gap between the two piers
offering shelter for the harbour from winter storms and the like
 

I would really love to make a largish quilted piece some time

inspired by the colours lines numbers and rings in these photos 

I'm glad I managed to get these photos as it's ...

 

"baulks up, boats down" on March 21st

that means the "baulks" will be lifted by crane so that the Mousehole "gap"

(between the two piers) will be open again for boats to go in and out

 

 

friend Sue was very patient ... I took rather a lot of photos as usual

most of the time my camera was down in one particular bit of beach

 

there I found so many things to inspire that had a textile "feel" to them ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

looking closely at nature is such a joy

 

 

 

I never imagined I would find all this on a rocky bit of beach!

 

 

(and all the while my house is in sight)

 

this time a week ago I had a brilliant crow day gelli printing with friend Jo

I think you will agree these are quite "grungy" for me!

 

 

 

I also printed with leaves (and feathers)

 

 

 

then ...

on Friday (the 13th) we were back in St. Ives

it was a beautiful bright day ... but very very bitterly cold

 

 

and blustery ...

 

 

 spray was washing right over the pier ... an awesome sight

 

I couldn't quite capture it for having to dodge it!

 

 

but, thankfully, the other side the harbour was sheltered by the pier wall

(love that ladder)

 

  St. Ives was at it's most beautiful ...

I was inspired to stitch ... 

a long sunlit day of swimming

a St. Ives cottage with rock pool details inspired by St. Ives colours

with stitches that match patterns and colours on the mussel shell

 

 

and a little Mousehole rock pool on silk
a sunny rock pool with bright green sea water
it will have gold on it ... reflections of skies and shimmer

with the bluest shells gathered from the beach at Godrevy

the hearts are almost finished ... I have several others I am working on too
but I cannot rush at the moment ... some days I prefer to collage or paint
some days I prefer to gather things and have sketchbook days

some days are wonderful and other days my heart is heavy

(there is a lot going on in my little world that I choose not to mention)

so I shall end here with a happy photo

and send you all lots of love from Cornwall ♥
(thank you so much for visiting me!)